Don’t Nobody Want to Come in Your Yard Anyway

Yesterday I was running around my neighborhood and I ran past as house that has a sagging roof, peeling paint and a yard so overgrown that I chose to run in the street rather than risk any gross nature germs getting on me. As I ran by, I saw a sign, nearly hidden next to the broken (open) rusty gate. “Private Property. No Trespassing.”

I stopped running and just stood there looking at the perfectly lovely houses surrounding it (none of which had a stupid sign) and laughed. Sure dude, keep me out, we’re all clamoring to get in to your nasty yard. Then I yelled “Don’t nobody want to come in your yard anyway.” and then I ran really fast because who knows who lives there?

Thinking about that got me thinking about transparency and what it means and what it looks like and how arrogance is a large part of transparency or lack thereof. Here’s what I mean:

1) Protecting your updates. What that says to me is that you are arrogant. You presume to throw yourself on stage and then shut the curtains. It’s ridiculous and anyone with half a brain can see through the pseudo-humility being displayed. The other thing it could mean is that you are a stalker-attractor and therefore a little wacko anyway. Got a good reason for jumping on the social media bandwagon and hiding under a blanket? Leave it in the comments.

2) Closing or overmoderating comments. When I say overmoderating, I mean moderating out anything that isn’t SPAM or offensive (racist, sexist, profane etc). If you aren’t posting comments because they disagree with the crux of your post, even if you believe they’re wrong, then you are guilty of overmoderating. If you want a website where you are the grand poobah decider of all things, then have one, just don’t expect us to throw our well-crafted similies at your feet for fear they won’t be posted.

3) Being a super snob. Not replying to your @s (not every single one obviously, just the ones that invite response) and undermoderating your blog comments (big guilty person right here folks) are two ways to make people feel as if their opinions don’t matter. There are lots of folks whose blogs are no great shakes but they’ve learned to invite comments and become, in essence, salon directors, skilled at inspiring conversations and encouraging discussion.

4) Not minding your own beeswax. Most people won’t like this one. When twitter came out with the feature that made it so we all couldn’t see each other’s replies, I was relieved. Because I’ll tell you sometimes I can’t take the backslapping, flirting, you-promote-me-and-I’ll-promote-you stuff that goes on around here! If you’re having a conversation that is the professional equivalent of “No… you’re the best”, I can really only deal with two iterations of that before wanting to smack someone. Of course, now all the smart quasi-braggarts have figured out a workaround so we can continue to listen to them say how great they all are.

5) Retweeting how awesome someone else says you are. If I have to explain this, I don’t know what. (my husband said I do this but I don’t. One time someone said I was a crackhead or funny or something and I retweeted that because IT was funny.)

The fact of the matter is, I can understand a “Private Property” sign on a country club, a nice house, even by a smallish apartment pool if it’s clean. Your content, your personality and your brand will speak for itself. If you’re doing the above things, there’s no need to post a private property sign anywhere cuz don’t nobody want to come in your yard anyway.